Hair of the cat that bit me.

There are numerous resources out there for cat owners with allergies, but none of them discuss the specific problems associated with having a murderous kitten. They're about sneezing, not scratching. Not about the welts that rise when the little beast bites and breaks the skin. I'm bleeding, but it feels like I'm hemoraging. Ridiculous. Just ridiculous.

Having a cat isn't really the kind of responsibility that people led me to believe it would be. I think it would be different if I pretended that she was something more important than a housepet, but she isn't. Cats could be pretty time consuming if you believe that they need therapy, special organic foods or aesthetically pleasing toys, but the same goes for people. And I don't think those things are true for people.

Furthermore, my cat is beyond repair. She's a lead paint victim if ever I saw one. The stupidest, clumsiest, bipolar midget cat on the planet. She simultaneously cuddles and hisses, purrs and rends flesh from bone. She's got an eye twitch that won't quit. She's broken and that's all right with me so long as she doesn't expect special treatment.

You hear me, Questor? I'm gonna put you in the oven if you don't stop pushing all the stuff off the table. And get out of that plant. Oh, damnit.. don't push that. That's made of glass. AAh! I am NOT playing 52 card pickup with you again! Fucking cat!